When you think of success, what comes to mind? The house? The job? The killer wardrobe? A rocking body? Maybe some well-behaved kids in tow? We often picture things, don’t we?
We think of it like a one-size-fits-all all concept.
What if I told you your success had little to do with what you have and everything to do with how you feel...
What if success wasn’t a destination to reach, but instead something we could experience daily?
Success is not:
- A game of acquiring stuff or achieving things
- Something people can see
- Something others give us
-
A destination, there is no there
Our new version of success is:
Individually defined
We grow up surrounded by ideas of what success is. Whether it’s from our families, society, or even pop culture, these external definitions can often be out of sync with our internal truth. True success, though, is personal. It’s something only you can define for yourself. It might look different from what your parents envisioned or what your peers are chasing, but that’s where its power lies. It’s tailored to your values, desires, and the season of life you are in.
In a world that constantly tells us what success should look like, it can feel daunting to stop and redefine it for ourselves. But when we do, we open ourselves up to a version of success that’s uniquely aligned with who we are.
An internal experience
Success is not a thing, it’s a feeling. It has very little to do with what you have and more to do with how you feel. You could achieve everything you set out to do but still feel unfulfilled. Have you had that experience? You get the pay rise and not a whole lot changes. You buy the house (your pinnacle of success) and yes it feels good but you’re naturally onto the next thing. The game of life. The goals are great, but we don’t want to miss the point in pursuit of them.
Available to us every single day
Not when conditions externally are perfect or when we reach the destination. Success is a feeling we can experience every day in big or small moments.
The small things are really the big things and when we start to notice this, and celebrate it we notice it expands into the big things.
Evolving as we do
One of the most liberating truths about success is that it’s ever-changing. As we grow, our definition of success shifts. What once seemed important may no longer hold the same value, and that’s okay. Success isn’t static, it’s dynamic and something we work with. Allow your definition to change as you grow, and don’t be afraid to let go of goals that no longer resonate. You’re allowed to change and change again. It’s called evolution my friend, you’re not the first to experience it!
Start to get curious as to what you definition of success is. The things you desire do they feel true? Or do they feel bestowed upon you? It’s deep work but I promise you don’t want to get to the end of your life and realise you missed the point.
Bronnie Ware worked in palliative care in Australia and wrote the book The Top 5 regrets of The Dying. The top deathbed regrets she heard from her patients were….
- I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
- I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
- I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
- I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
- I wish I had let myself be happier.
Pretty powerful right?
Ask yourself these questions to help redefine your unique version of success...
- What does success feel like for you?
- What would a fulfilling life look like for you?
- What are you not willing to sacrifice in your pursuit of success?
Dive even deeper into this work with our Goal Setting Workbook. In the digital workbook you'll redefine your version of success, gain clarity on your priorities, and discover how you work best. From there, you'll set meaningful goals aligned with your true desires and break them down into actionable steps.